Bye, Brandon

Brandon died last night. Though not unexpected, he suffered mightily his last nine months or so, I still mourn his passing.

Brandon came to chat for the first time the night after Mason died. (Must have been that perfect storm, after all.) He jumped right in with both feet. He added a bit more sass to a group of sassy mostly older women. He teased and generally got conversations stirred up in no time.

He had a man thing about souped up cars and actually raced at the local dragway a few times. By the time we met, his disease had progressed enough that he could not do much of anything. Brandon's family lived on his military retirement. (Brandon had a heart defect in addition to the pulmonary hypertension. Makes you wonder about the competency of the military if they accepted him.)

Brandon had a son and a daughter who never got the chance to know a regular dad. Though not infants, their memories of their dad likely will be few. He told the kids he was going to heaven to talk to God. How hard that must have been.

The last nine months of Brandon's life were spent in the hospital. His heart worked less and less and he had fluid issues constantly. The few times I actually talked to him, he still was upbeat and sassy.

Brandon and I spoke on the phone a few times. Mostly about food and restaurants. He loved to eat, maybe because he had lived in Copperas Cove and had a Texas-size appetite.

All of us who have PH hate what it does to people. The potion to keep us alive offers some nasty side effects. I am fortunate that mine is mild. Others suffer with extreme headaches, vomiting, foot pain, jaw pain. Some of my friends have to take some pretty powerful pain meds just to be able to get up.

Most often another disease rides along for fun. Connective tissue diseases, lupus, and a whole slew of others.

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I have my first visit with the counselor Monday. I am going into this with few expectations and at the same time many. The past couple of years have been tough. I pretty much lost my identity when I lost my job. I found new friends online. Now it seems, I am losing them one by one.

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Dude, not a day goes by that I do not think of you and miss you.

Later.