I have been unnerved signing into FB and seeing your name showing as online. The little green dot represents all that we once had and nevermore in this life will have. Funny how an electronic symbol can trigger a reaction of the soul.
Pete sent a message that I was "absolutely present in spirit" at your services. I did the best I could Paul. One of these days we will get together and talk again like we used to. We will have to have Pete join us. He has been remarkably understanding.
I am doing my best in the fantasy leagues. I am torn, as are your friends, about continuing. On the one hand, I know you would be pissed if we do not carry on with the one thing you have loved most of your life. On the other hand, checking the teams is a painful reminder that you are no longer here. Your death has left a hole in many lives.
But the leagues also are a reminder of the joy we shared over a goal or how disgruntled with Liverpool you were. Those memories make me smile. So I have decided to keep up with my teams. The others can do what they think is best for themselves.
You always made me feel special; for that I am grateful. I only hope that I gave you some solace in your final days. I wanted you to know how special you were. I hope I did not burden you further.
Days may not be fair Always,
That's when I'll be there Always.
Not for just an hour,
Not for just a day,
Not for just a year,
But Always.
Irving Berlin
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