Wednesday, April 13, 2011

No. 500 and counting

This post marks the 500th time I sat at my computer and wrote down some of my thoughts. Perhaps we should have a virtual party with helium balloons, a sheet cake from the local bakery, a tune or two, and a toast. At least something momentous.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-5zlj49ugk

From the first post in December 2009, I laid my heart out. I examined my life, I worried about my friends and most of all I mourned. What a long bumpy ride. I marked small victories and bemoaned the times I stumbled. Guess what? Mourning does not come with a switch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7RbYKVcx0so&NR=1

Writing was an education in self. I learned what I can take and what I refuse to face. I examined the dark places and found sightless unspeakable horrors. Guilt wears an ugly robe of accusations and self-loathing. But the boogeyman fails the tough test when the light of reason reveals the truth. The white hot flames of anger seared me. Somewhere in the ashes I found myself.

I talked about my buddy PH. I fight a battle I will not win. That does not mean I am ready to quit. Just stating facts and looking for ways to dodge the inevitable for awhile longer.

Life does go on, but I do not forget. I hope I did not disappoint you, too.

Later, Dude.

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