Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Wiseacre

If one can physically feel anxious, I do today. Not sure what this indicates, but I do not like the feeling. My chest and throat seem heavy. Almost a tickle in my throat, but not really that either. How do you describe a symptom to a doctor when you cannot describe it to yourself? I have hit extra lasix two days in a row and still swelling plagues me. (Of course, those chips do not help the situation.)

All this focus on health irritates me. Enough already. "The new reality" "Better get used to it, that is the way it will be." Stop being a whiner. Check out the grace of others who are far worse than I. I hope to heck when the end comes I will not think of my life as a total waste.

Here I possess all this wisdom and my body refuses to let me apply it. Generally you gain wisdom by living, not by osmosis. Then at the end of your life, what do you do with the wisdom?

I wonder if the great thinkers realized they were wise and decided to share or did they just write it down like a giant doodle? I wonder about their emotional lives. Does mental pain produce genius? Or does genius guarantee emotional baggage?

My curiosity about your early years stirs. Now I want to learn as much as I can. I hope you left enough clues for me.

Later.

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