Hello, sadness my old friend, I've come to talk to you again ....
I seem to make messes quite unintentionally. I just should keep my cybermouth shut. Period.
Other relationships move in positive directions. I enjoy these small exchanges of repartee. I hope eventually this expands.
Am I sad because I isolate, or do I isolate because I am sad?
Believing the best in everyone gets me into trouble. Take the yard man. I paid him before he finished the yard. The yard sits half finished. I suspect he decided to party instead.
I bet a certain someone would express shock to learn I actually defended them -- not once, but twice.
I wonder if I canonize you? I question this over and over knowing a good answer does not exist. I do know you were special. I know you pretended with some people.
All these questions haunt me still. The great enigma of you. You gotta love it. You know what? The desire for a mystery itself says more than your words. Or speaks louder, maybe.
Do I have a right to mourn you so? Because I do. Days go by, I remember something you said, some comment about shit sports. I grin.
Then like a tsunami the sadness and grief overcome me. Like today. I cannot think about you without tears falling. I miss you...
Later.
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