Time machine

The time draws near when the desk drawer needs a thorough cleanout. My computer sits atop this former library table. Pull the drawer out, press a button and the front of the drawer flattens. Inside the rather shallow drawer a place for an ink bottle and pencils or pens. And a mini-shelf.

My desk drawer serves as my catchall space. Open the drawer and you will find a prism in the shape of an octagon. It should hang in a window that gets sun and make rainbows. Kittens sent it packing to the drawer.

A tiny snowglobe sits in one corner of the drawer. A miniature Reno forever in a shower of mineral water and glitter.

An empty matchbook from the Holiday Inn in Strasbourg. No close cover before striking in French. Guess the French rule in the smart department.

A trio of former marine life -- a couple of The Littlest Mermaid shells and a counch which fits into my hand. The intricate swirls, the almost glass feel.

Two expired passports. Hard evidence of memories.

Some registration papers for Wu. Wu was a beautiful lilacpoint Siamese baby and an Okie. I drove to another state to get Wu.

Then in all its glory sits a pile of papers. Envelopes with addresses I mean to put in the computer. Sheets of paper with my Afrikaan lessons on them. They need a home in the computer as well. An extra copy of proof of automobile insurance.

Sitting to the right of the computer, a table holds a basket stuffed with file folders. I learned to keep documents, bills and written notes about phone calls. That practice served me well more than once.

* * *

I am not sure I get it. I am not business minded. Not everyone sports a cutthroat vibe, thank goodness. I try hard to do what I say I will because I know how I rely on the word of others. I do need to learn not to overdo. As much as I want to help, I should leave the things I know nothing of to someone who does. I always can offer an ear and honest feedback.

* * *

I wonder what you think of all this? As someone astutely pointed out to me, we cannot pretend to know. I can suppose based on the you I knew. I can compare notes with others and form a concensus. I would love to talk to the one person who knew you best. The enigma which surrounds you would clear up a bit, I think. I am not cheeky enough, though, to ask.

I do know I miss you terribly still. The loss weighs heavy on my heart.

Later.