The big news: my pulmonary hypertension is primary, not secondary. By the time I had absorbed that news, I was in another room doing my FEV and gas exchanges, etc. Then bloodwork. I am not really sure why he changed the diagnosis after all this time, I think he told me but my mind was stuck in neutral. Anyway, I do not think in the long run, the fact makes much difference. He did say my meds held the major symptoms, and thus the major meds, at bay. He also said he now leans toward PH as the cause of my blackouts.
Lack of time played a part in the unsatisfactory. I had the feeling of rush this time. A bad day on his part, who knows.
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All in all, yesterday proved worthy of mention. I had some rather wonderful conversations and learned a bunch about two of the people. I shared a bit of my heart, too. Talking with the third person becomes even more comfortable over time. That friendship connected right from the get-go. Your CD took top honors as talk topics. What a wonderful tribute to you. I wonder which song you wrote last. I will have to ask. I am putting Kirsop's copies in the mail today. I promised him "Because of a Woman" and "The Postman Delivers." He seemed thrilled. I know he misses you too.
After being blasted yesterday, not once, but twice, I am ready to move on. Que sera sera. Probably a great loss for all concerned, and my bad.
I got some good advice yesterday. I am the one in control of my thoughts. No one can "make" me feel bad. I am the one who allows events to cause me anger or sadness. I should work on me, not lash out at others.
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I had a few minutes of just plain sweet yesterday, too. Connie, Zane and I went to the grocery to pick up some soup. If angels walk on earth, Zane fills the bill. * * *
Today marks a new day, dude, but I will never forget.Later.
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